Now....

I have that feeling in my stomach where I want to just cry. Cry because why?
I think it's because of Girly Man. He rang today saying that he's moving interstate on Thursday. It's a good thing, i'm just upset because I don't know.
Process of elimation. It's not the fact that i'm not going out with Raff tonight (she rang and cancelled) It's not becaust Girly mans leaving.
Eve? Yeah - I think it may be a little of that and the fact that Girly Man and his partner& kids are going interstate... but then I may go and see them one day.
Eve.Hmmm. I don't know.His brother came in today for a haircut and his dad lent me a CD on Christianity evoulation or creation which will be interesting.
When his brother came in today I said - "Eve - Mk's out the back" I said the wrong name I said Eve instead of MK! I don't know if he heard but I couldn't believe he said that. Seeing his brother just reminds me of him and....yeah.
I was telling Deb how I really don't like Eve as a person and she said
"That must be hard having him just randomly come in and out of your life like that."
I said no but really - I think that's it. It is hard. It's hard.
When I see him I lust after him and would like to have him but it's totally just lust.Attraction and if I got to know him before I shagged him then I'm sure the attraction would have died because his personality would have totally turned me off. But I didn't. It was that after, so I didn't like the inside person but lusted for the Passion and great sex.
I better go and have a sleep.
I'm tired.
I had a crap day at work today - I was slow and I thought my cuts looked like crap.
Mk didn't say anything but I kinda wish he did.